Chap. 353 The argument

We’re going back to the trader’s caravan?

Yes, K’ndar said, making sure the pannier was securely lashed into place.

I don’t want anything to spill, he thought.

It is food for the trader?

It is. I’m sure Lizard’s going to have troubles cooking. His shoulder is slashed and I’m betting he can’t handle his cast iron oven. It’s heavy.

I hear you thinking about sleeping rough tonight?

Yes. Tomorrow is a rest day, so I’m taking my bedroll, I’ll spend tonight there and tomorrow I have all day to do things like groom his horses and dig a latrine. I don’t think there’s room in his caravan for me so I’ll sleep outside.

I don’t mind. I can help dig, too. I like to dig.

K’ndar laughed. I know. So does Siskin.

The blue fire lizard chittered in agreement from his perch on a high ledge in the dragon bay. The brown fire lizard was beside him, watching K’ndar harness Raventh.

I remember the very first time we were here at Landing. You were scared of so many strangers and the walls. You even got lost! So you came out to our dragon meadow and fell asleep between my forelegs.

You’re right! I’d forgotten that!

That’s when I learned humans roar when they are sleeping.

Roar? Like a lion roar?

Not like a lion roar. I don’t know the human word for it. It’s a noise you make only when you’re asleep. Like this:

Raventh made a very good imitation of a snore.

That sounds like snoring. I don’t snore.

Snore, roar, you do.

Really?

Yes. Why would I say it if it weren’t true?

Huh. I snore. I had no idea. I’m sound asleep.

I don’t understand human sleeping. Part of my mind is always awake, listening. When you are asleep you stop thinking like you are right now. You have stories going on in your head when you’re asleep. You do things like fly in the stories with your arms, not wings.

Stories? Ah. Dreams. We call them dreams.

Dreams. You dream in your sleep.

Dragons don’t dream?

Even before we hatch we dream, but I don’t remember those. We do dream but they make sense, like hunting. Eating. Not like yours.

Hmm. I had no idea I snored. I remember my father and Uncle Fland, they sounded like hogs being butchered.

Tell Siskin we’re about to go. I have no idea the brown’s name. Ask him if he’d like to join us.

His human called him Kelso.

Kelso. I like it. I was afraid his name was zigzag.

That’s not a good name for anything.

True.

He says he will come with us.

Is there a reason he doesn’t send me images, like Siskin, or you? Is he afraid of me?

Raventh was silent for several moments.

Right now he is confused. Fire lizards are a lot like us dragons, they don’t want too many voices in their minds. They choose who to send images to. He knows his human is dead. He is not afraid of other humans, he just doesn’t know if he should stay or go.

Is he thinking of leaving us? Tell him he’s welcome.

Yes, he thought, I’d keep him. He’s a nice fire lizard, he gets along with Siskin nicely.

He is not leaving. Not right now. He’s still trying to decide what to do. It’s just been a little while since his human died.

By the egg, Raventh is right, he thought. It’s still the same day as all the activities this morning. I don’t think I like these long, long days. I seem to go back and forth, some days by noon I’m bored mindless with nothing to do, then I have days like this with every minute packed full.

Just then he heard shouting erupting from the quarters next door. Francie was clearly angry. The tone in her voice said it was more than just anger that a cake hadn’t come out right.

And just like that, his mind was filled with memories of a turbulent childhood. He was twelve years old, witnessing his father punch his mother in the face. Again.

I’ll never forget it, he thought. I never saw him hit an animal. But when it came to us, Hanliss never restrained his ferocious temper. There was no predicting what would cause him to erupt. I don’t remember what set him off that time, it wasn’t anything Mum had done. She was just the nearest human to him at the moment.

He hit Mum so hard she fell down. I remember wondering why she wrapped her arms around her stomach rather than try to ward off another blow. Now I know she was pregnant with Glyena. Now I know how she’d lost an earlier pregnancy.

Sandriss just snapped. He flew over Mum and hit Hanliss with everything in his sixteen year old frame. Whoa, what a blow. It was like he’d trained for that moment his whole life. Of course, we’d all seen Dad do it a hundred times. For a moment the three of us looked at Hanliss and I thought oh I hope he’s dead. Then Sand said, “I love you, Mum.” I followed him out of the cavern to the barn, where he’d stashed a backpack, as if he’d planned it all out. He was about to saddle his horse when Uncle Fland came up, with his horse all tacked up, even a bedroll on the back. He didn’t need to ask what was going on, he just knew. He told Sand, “Take my horse, he’s a gift. This way you can’t be accused of horse theft. Take care of yourself, Sandriss. You’re a good man.”

Just before Sand rode off, he said, “Tell Mum I won’t be back. If I’ve killed him I’ll never be able to return. Beware, Kandar, now you’re his scapegoat.”

He shook himself from his reverie. Even to this day, the memories kick my adrenaline up.

He recognized Francie’s voice, made louder as she was in her dragon’s bay. Shards, I had no idea voices would travel from their building all the way here. She sounds furious.

She is angry. Motanith is upset, she says they are fighting.

FIGHTING?

With words. Not with hands.

I can’t not hear them, he thought, distressed at this unintentional and unavoidable eavesdropping of their private lives. But, as his mother used to say, when you’re pushed hard enough, you don’t care who hears you.

“Yes, I’m going. It’s not forever! I have three hours before sunset. What IS it with you, Raylan, it’s not as if you’re going to go hungry. I made enough food for three of you and I’m taking some to him. He’s hurt.”

He heard Raylan’s voice say something. The timbre was too low for him to hear the words. But Francie was shouting, perhaps intentionally?

I do NOT want to be involved. I’ll just hide here in our bay until…well, when?

“Has it occurred to you that he saved a young woman’s life, a woman sent into dreadful danger by those shaffing idiots at Lemos? They didn’t give a damn. Let’s not mention that he possibly saved Pern’s entire economy.”

Raylan responded.

“Scandal? Shaff scandal! VIXEN told me. The whole thing. I know about the spymaster. I know about the attacks on both continents. That’s the problem. Those arses at Lemos Hold keeping the murders secret? That’s scandal, Raylan! Don’t think it’s going to stay quiet for long. Gossip flies at light speed.”

Raylan responded.

“The Council? They don’t have the bollocks of a capon. They should have stood up on their hind legs years ago and told Toric straight up, you no play-a the game, you no make-a the rules. Period. Toric has the blood of two runners on his hands and the Council is too effing scared of him to punish him. Everyone’s afraid of that fat lout except for a girl who was half scalped and a trader who’s willing to protect her.”

Raylan said something, louder, but not clear enough to make out.

“I don’t give a damn if they hear me or not. What will they do to me? Banish me for speaking truth to power? Then have at it. I’ve half a mind to go to Lemos and tell them what a pack of cowards they are, to knowingly send a girl with that kind of money and not a single escort, never mind a weapon, of any sort.”

“Francie! You don’t want to lose your job!”

“Lose my job? I don’t HAVE one other than being your wife. I moved from Kahrain Weyr, where I DID have a job, so I could live here with you. Apparently everyone thought I came here to offer my dragon as free transport.

I grew up-we ALL grew up in a culture that said, you help out with anything the Weyr or the Hold needs. You did it because you knew the work was necessary and everyone, even the Weyrleader, did their part. But Landing isn’t any of those. Remember? “Landing is a business” “Landing is a research facility as well as a governing body.”

Raylan mumbled something.

“Yes, I’m hot! I don’t mind doing tasks assigned by the council for the benefit of Landing. I don’t get paid, it’s just expected. But now, every day, I’m called on by just about anyone who wants something right now, delivered by dragon. Francie won’t you take this person up to Telgar. Francie, we need a dragon lift from Cove Hold, Francie, I know you’re busy but I need a new thimble, take me to Singing Water’s market. They seem to think that dragons are just ‘things’ that don’t need sleep or exercise. Not to mention me!”

For a moment there was quiet. She’d lowered her decibel level and now he couldn’t help but listen.

“Okay. I haven’t told you this because you’re busy at work. But yesterday, some dingbat woman calls me on my datalink and says, without even a hello, not even a name, “Francie, I need a ride to Nerat, I’m having a dinner party and want to hit their fish market as soon as the fishing boats put in.”

“Can you believe the gall? Like I’m a drudge, expected to drop what I’m doing, dry off the grass so her fine leather boots don’t get wet from the dew? When I said NO she said DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM? and she would make me sorry. I AM sorry, you know that? I’m sorry that we even came here, if I’d known I was going to be treated like this, I’d have never left Kahrain Weyr.”

He heard Raylan raising his voice, and thought, I do not want to hear this. I’m out of here. I should have opened the bay door before harnessing Raventh.

Siskin and Kelso appeared and settled on Raventh’s neck.

“Let’s go, lads, before…”

But it was too late. He heard the screech of their dragon bay door open.

Raylan called out something unintelligible.

“Yes. I’ll be back,” she shouted.

He saw her fire lizards swarm out of the bay, followed by Motanith with Francie aboard in flying gear. The dragon’s eyes were whirling orange. She didn’t bother to shut their bay door.

They launched. He watched them until the green had vanished between.

Good. Let’s get out of here while the getting’s good.

He pressed the bay door opening switch. Raventh waited til it cleared his head and waddled out.

K’ndar followed and turned to press the door closed.

Raylan was standing outside his quarter’s dragon bay.

K’ndar kept his eyes downcast, not wanting his boss to know he’d heard them arguing.

But he did have to raise them in order to see where he was going. Raylan caught his eyes. “Let me guess. You heard every word,” he said.

He flushed, heat rising in his chest. “Uh..I have no idea what you’re talking about,” he lied.

“My arse, K’ndar. You’re a lousy liar. You’re going back to check on Lizard. Aren’t you.”

Suddenly he had enough. What the shaff, suddenly I have to explain myself? I understand, now, a little of Francie’s fury. Don’t blame me for being embarassed by your wife’s shouting. From what I heard she’s got a legitimate complaint. I like you, Raylan, but I’m not your kid. I’m not even your friend, right now.

“It’s none of my business, sir. And it’s not fair,” he said, heatedly. “I came back here immediately after you called me back. Tomorrow is a rest day. I’ve never been asked to justify my off duty activities before.”

He wanted to end it with “with you” but bit it off. I could lose my job, I’ve lied to him for the first time ever. But damn it, I’m sick of being held on a tight leash, being a target, however soft, when he’s being pissy. What I do on my own time is my own business.

Raylan dropped his head. How do I ask him to take me with him? he thought, anguish clouding his thinking. Do I dare? I can only imagine what would happen if I showed up on Raventh. I don’t want to fight with Francie, we’ve never had an argument, I had no idea what she’s been dealing with. I can’t talk to her with an audience. Why was she so loud? To purposefully embarrass me? It’s bad enough K’ndar heard. Better I let her do what she wants, let her cool off. When she comes home I’ll explain myself.

If she comes home. I’ve never seen her so angry. Why didn’t she tell me she was being misused?

Now I’ve pissed off K’ndar, it seems.

He sighed, submitting to the inevitable.

“You don’t have to tell me where you’re going or why. But please? Keep an eye on Francie, please? She’s pretty hot right now.”

Do I dare say why? K’ndar thought. He nodded.

Say nothing. Mount up and let’s go.